Dreams

I'm dreaming ...

...dreaming of a bike trip with friends. A trip where our time is our own, the days are cool and filled with the blooms of spring. At night our b&b will soothe us with hot tubs and we'll sip fine, Missouri wine. In the morning the breakfasts will fill our bellies for a long day's ride. The river and fields will fill our vision, and we'll return home with tales of fun, comradeship and even a little adventure.

Ah, to dream. But dreams are where plans begin, so who knows...?

Dog days

It's not really the dog days of summer ... those come in a couple months when every day is hot and the body drags. Hiking and gardening become early morning activities and the smell of charcoal and steak fills the evening air.

Sidebar: From the little I've read, the phrase has its origins in the ancient belief that Sirius, also the Dog Star, was somehow responsible for the hot weather.

I have, though, been using an awful lot of dog references lately. Not sure why that is, but one of my readers thought it was particularly funny. In response to that, here's my dog-ness for today. :-D

Today I am a golden retriever - I've been around a lot of people so I'm happy, I'm languid in the heat, but I'm still accomplishing a few tasks (but what a retriever accomplishes on a hot Friday afternoon, I have no idea, although it surely has something to do with napping and licking his paws...).

What is your inner dog?

Day is done

"The day is done, and the darkness

falls from the wings of night,

as a feather is wafted downward

from and eagle in his flight."

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

My day's toil is complete, and to bed I steal, weary and full, kittie and book awaiting, both to lull me to sleep. The warmth of the day floats away as the cool of night descends. No birds sing, the traffic is stilled.

Tomorrow is just around the corner. Another day to fill with friends, chores, quiet, music, life. I'm thankful ... for my soft bed, for my sisters' love, for my quiet house. I'm thankful for good friends, co-workers who make life easier and challenge me to do better. I'm thankful for kids I see growing and changing, beautiful spring days, and the love of a good man.

Goodnight, goodnight...til it be morrow!

Dog pictures courtesy of Amy and Toby Landers! :-)

Tuesday

It's kind of chilly outside, Egg is curled up in a ball of fluff and purring, and the blankets on my bed are still harboring warmth. I slip out of them and into my walking shoes. If I don't go for a walk now, I won't get it in today. But those blankets, and Egg's soft fur are so tempting. No, I'm leaving! On with my socks, a sweatshirt, my knee brace, lace up my shoes, choose something on the iPod and I'm out the door.

I'd rather lie in bed for another two hours, reading, dozing, then start the motions of my day, but I'd better do it now.

In truth (if I can wake up enough) there's something lovely about early mornings. My neighborhood is filled with lovely flower beds that are changing daily, the trees are filling out, and it is still cool. I'll get this walk in, then I'll have the whole day ahead of me. And it is actually quite nice starting the day this way - with quiet, motion, a little sweat.

So here I go...

Relapse

The kinder, lovelier me lost a battle with anger this weekend. Long story that I won't bore you with. Today means a fresh, new start. But I'm not exactly bouncing through it!

Some Mondays I jump out of bed ready to tackle the week. I look eager...like this!

Other Mondays I drag, drink my tea, eat some breakfast, and then find it is 10:15 and I still haven't really gotten started on my day. I had two lovely conversations with friends, though. That counts for something, right?

Today I only have 3 tasks set for myself: pay bills, do laundry, and tackle the giant mess in my kitchen. I guess if I get moving, I can still do all three by the time my brain shuts off around 3:00 p.m.

Oh, yes, I'm a bundle of energy today...NOT! This is more what I look like today!

Today I'll merely plod along, but I'll try to think about my blow-up this weekend. It was ugly. And since every day is a new one, I'll still be thankful for this one. Even if I only get to 2 of my tasks. :-)

A sanctuary

I certainly don't live on the busiest of streets, but there's plenty of traffic what with the 2 bus stops, the 4-way stop just down the block, and the school farther down the street. Along with the cars, there's lots of foot traffic. Needless to say, my front yard isn't the quietest, most restful of spots.

And when we moved into this house, almost everything about it was ugly from the chain link fence and overgrown juniper bushes to the falling apart wall-to-wall closet in the cave of a bedroom.

But we're working to make it beautiful. We tore down that chain link fence. We remodeled the whole bedroom. We painted each room colors that I adore and that make me smile just thinking about them. And this spring and summer I hope to carve out a quiet space for myself in a small back room that is filled with sunshine.

The front yard is really coming together, too. I'm creating a sanctuary for myself even on this busy street. And a sanctuary for others, too, I hope. Tim bought me this lovely birdbath for my birthday last year. It is ready and waiting for any feathered friends.

This summer, I think I will choose to not hear the cars or buses. This summer, I will sit on my front porch and read as the sun drops below the mountain. This summer, I will eat dinner on my back deck and feel the cool of the day as it drops onto my shoulders.

How much of life do I get to choose? Probably more than we realize. Attitude, emotions, responses, actions - these are all things over which I have much control. As hard as I work to exert control over the many growing things in my garden (both wanted and unwanted), shouldn't I work that hard to control myself, mold myself into something beautiful? Not in a false, forced way, but in the sense of constant improvement, working toward a lovelier, softer, kinder me.

May I be a reflection of the good in life, the God of love, and the power of choice!

Here we go again

It's so exciting to put seeds and plants in the ground and then watch them grow. Last year's strawberries are blooming like crazy, and the patches of pink flowers all over the front yard are just beautiful! I'd forgotten how pretty a simple strawberry plant is.

What a joy to wake up early this morning and watch the sun as it gathered steam, slowing coming over the roof of the garage to dapple all my lovely plants in its light. The birds are singing up a storm, people are walking their happy dogs in the cool of the morning, and I'm drinking a hot cup of sweet tea.

What a way to start a day!

We're approaching the end of May, and so, according to most authorities, it is safe to start planting here in Colorado. There's no guarantee it still won't freeze, but it is less likely than even a week ago. I was determined this year I would start things off from seed to save money, but I just didn't get to that. Next year?

So I compromised. I bought my herbs and a few plants, but will do some from seed, too. I'm excited about my little garden, and it is just so pretty with the newly turned, dark chocolate brown earth. Such an inviting bed for my baby seeds. :-)

I've got a couple tomatoes from which I hope to get more than a bumper crop of green tomatoes, although I must say those green tomatoes last year were quite tasty! :-) I will have a few rows of lettuce and beets through the really hot weather, then I'll plant more seeds when falls gets closer. I'm doing carrots again, and this year trying okra (for Tim), and yellow wax beans. I meant to get pole beans, but I think I have bush beans. We'll see how much room they take up. I might have to crowd the okra. :-)

Meanwhile, my herbs from last year are thriving, flowering, adding an early beauty to my otherwise bare garden. Such a wonder to me the profusion of color, smells, shapes, and soon to be flavors that come out of the earth. And how thankful I am for each of them!

P.S. If you have chives, violets or nasturtiums, think about using them in salads and as garnishes this spring and summer. Lots of flowers (but not all!) are edible. Many have a lovely, peppery taste. Check out this website for more info. Think of the color and surprise you could add to your family's plate!

http://whatscookingamerica.net/EdibleFlowers/EdibleFlowersMain.htm

Small mercies

Remember my weekend theme of quiet and contemplation?

Yesterday I received a small gift. Tim signed up for a photography class, which means I'll get every Wednesday night alone, quiet, at home for 4 weeks in June and July. Yeah! Amazing how things work out.

Just when I'm thinking I need some more quiet in my life, I get it in a pretty easy way. I'd like to be purposeful in my use of those hours, but I've got a couple weeks to think about it.

Wonderful!

Life

Have I made my marriage sound perfect? I sure hope not, because it isn't. But I made a decision when I started this blog that I wouldn't write nasty stuff about people in my life...or crazy drivers I encounter...or weird ladies in the grocery store line...unless that would be a funny story. :-)

I just didn't want to air my dirty laundry.

This week the truth of how many people in my life are hurting has been renewed in my mind. A friend newly diagnosed with cancer, my dad is sick, hurting marriages, dating friends breaking up, struggles with kids, parents, families. There is so much hurting in the world.

Sure wish I could do more to help, but I know those struggles aren't my burden to carry. Except in prayer and love given. Those things I can do.

If you haven't noticed, I write about me. Me! I guess that's what a lot of blogs are about. I just want to make sure my life isn't all about me. I know there's a time and a place for protecting my own space and energy, focusing on the things that will help give me peace, but I also want to be sure I'm giving away enough of me.

Balance. It's all about balance.

A theme

Contemplation. Quiet. Time alone.

It seemed there was a theme to my weekend. Saturday morning was filled with quiet, and I loved it. Sunday morning I woke up wishing I could have a day of absolute quiet in each week, and how could I accomplish that. In addition, I was scheming about how to glean for myself a whole week of quiet sometime this summer or fall. All this was roiling about in my head when I went to church on Sunday and...the message was about contemplation, quiet, and time alone with God.

A divinely inspired theme!

So, it seems all signs are pointing toward more quiet in my life. How can I achieve this? What do I need to adjust in my life? Which things should I sluff off, and what things should I just rearrange? Is it merely a need to be more purposeful?

I'll give this some thought and experiment a little over the next couple weeks. The idea of more quiet sounds wonderful, as does the idea of living each day with a little more purpose, both in what I do and don't do.

Isn't it great to have a goal higher than just getting the laundry done? :-)

Weekend

It has been a good one. In such a quiet way.

I washed clothes and dishes. I put together a no-cook meal for hubby and me. I enjoyed a very quiet Saturday morning at home.

And now Sunday's here, and it will be filled with people I love. The sun is shining, there's a picnic I might go on, and I got to sleep in. What could be more lovely?

Look what I made!

I'm so proud...because aren't they cute?

Free day

I have a Saturday just for me! Nothing scheduled except a phone conversation with a great friend many miles away, and a walk with another friend. The sun is shining, Tim is out of the house, my kittie is napping, and I have nothing I have to do!

Granted, my to-do list is quite long, but I think today I'll ignore it and do just what I want. Not sure what that is, but over this steaming, sweet mug of tea I'll figure that out.

Maybe I'll weed and start my vegetable garden. Maybe I'll finish The Bonesetter's Daughter. Maybe I'll write book reviews for my long-neglected book blog. The day is wide open with the lovely possibility of long, quiet hours.

Wonderful!

Words

Isn't the ambiguity of words a strange thing? In English, we have some very precise words, and yet when they are read they can connote very different meanings to different readers, and particularly different nuances from what the writer intended. I find this fascinating, especially in this particular time of humanity when so much of how we communicate is through written words - e-mails, texts and blogs!

I don't think I'll do this very often, but I feel like backtracking from what I wrote last time...or at least saying something more about it. I'll make it short, though.

I'm pretty sure my last blog adequately conveyed this tough time of the year for me, but I don't think I communicated just how buoyed and encouraged I was feeling, particularly by the fun and joy of beautiful music. That's really what I wanted to share. How those strains filling my house seemed to fill my heart with a little bubble of happiness.

Thanks, though, to all of you who in the past week have shared with me your love and care. It touched me and buoyed me up even more! ?