Scattered

I should be writing about what a wonderful weekend I had, how amazing and refreshing the hours spent with my friend Julie were, how incredibly beautiful Wyoming was, and how fun the wedding celebrations were...but I just can't seem to get those words out. Tomorrow, maybe?

All I can write about is my belly - and what in the world is going on in there? I'm quite anxious, to say the least, to find out what the 2nd ct revealed. Will it be clear and conclusive? Will I have to have more tests? Am I going to have to have surgery? And the lingering worry always in the back of my mind...do I have cancer?

I know, I know. I need to just relax and wait to find out.

Easier said than done.

But I see my doctor on Friday afternoon, so I will at least have some answers by then. And that's only a day and a half away.

Meanwhile, Lisa leaves tomorrow for the midwest before heading home to the middle east. Boo! I hate to see her go. I'm very sad. And her leaving somehow makes Dad's death seem more real. Yuck to both things.

Today is starting out stressful and sad, so I'd better put on my walking shoes and go for a stroll. Clear my head. Listen to some music. Refocus.

So then the question arises - when do I do all that, and when do I just let myself FEEL? Confusing... Today I think I'll try the walking/refocusing thing. Am I rambling yet? :-)