Satisfaction

I spent an afternoon and evening with a friend, reading, studying, discussing, clarifying, and just talking - then eating such delicious food! Simple, direct, hot food cooked in the oven for hours, to get the potatoes soft and the butternut squash even softer - almost a gravy for the meat. Her homemade sourdough bread's crust crunched in our mouths, surrounding the soft, yielding middle that we'd slicked with butter. 

We sat in her warmly lit living room, eating, laughing, then reading Robert Frost poetry. One from our evening's readings stuck in  my mind, and here it is for you.

Peril of Hope

It is right in there

betwixt and between

the orchard bare

and the orchard green,

when the boughs are right 

in a flowery burst

of pink and white, 

that we fear the worst.

For there's not a clime

but at any cost

will take that time

for a night of frost.

Lovely, lovely Robert Frost. 

Charlie

I'm missing Charlie. 

I didn't think through how long I would shed tears for the little guy who was in my life for so long. I didn't know tears would well up almost every day after 2 months. I guess it only makes sense. So as a catharsis, here are the things that I'm really missing this week...

...the way he wanted me to rub right on his closed eyes and on the bridge of his nose. He would push so hard against my rubbing fingers that he would lift himself off his front legs.

...his snuggliness. I could hardly sit for 1 minute without him coming and asking for lap time. I spent nary an evening without him on my lap. I miss the presence of his warm body and soft fur!

...his crazy hoarse voice greeting me. His greetings in general. Until the last year or so of his life when he was feeling old and going deaf, he greeted me at the front door every time I came in. 

...his graceful and elegant presence. As opposed to Egg who is adorable, but goofy and silly. Definitely not elegant.

Note the silly look on his face! Makes me smile, though...

I guess that's enough of a list. It's a gray day here, so I think my heart is reflecting it. That and last night I woke up once and out of the corner of my eye, and for just a split-second, thought it was Charlie lying on the bed. Boo...

...just thoughts floating around...

Days fly by, leaves fall, light deepens into gold. My favorite time of year!

My life is good and rich filled with love and sweet moments. 

My life has an undercurrent of loss flavored by the passing of time - wedding ring, kittie, old friends, old house, independence.

Move on, hold on, press on.

Jam is made and vegetable beds are laid to rest for the winter. My dried corn stalks decorate the front yard.

I watch the seasons change outside my bedroom window.

I sleep missing Charlie's warm body. I wake missing his hoarse meow. Egg comforts me in his goofy way.

I learn to guard my time and work toward my goals. 

I learn to say no and yes.

Time passing, gently, quickly, unevenly. Life as I know it. 

Hijacked!

Well, not exactly, but have you ever had one of those weeks that you had mapped out with just the right amount of people time, down time, and then enough time to get everything done before a deadline? This was one of those weeks. 

Then it happened. My husband got a project with a deadline of Friday night. He could either disappoint the house-owner and put the project off a month, or hammer it out this week. I offered my services to him for 2 1/2 days. Those days have eaten up my leisurely week. 

Now it's my turn to hammer out a project. You see, tomorrow morning I'm having a tea for a friend who is visiting from out of town, and as of today my house looks like a human tornado blew through! (Friend, when you read this - NO GUILT!!) ;-D I'll work all day, get done as much as I can, then just smile at the rest. After all, everyone coming over is a dear friend, so they will love me no matter what. Sure would be nice to have a pretty house to present, though. 

The real tragedy is that I've had to greatly simplify my menu, but that's all right, too. After all, I get the satisfaction of having helped Tim for two days (that's not to be read sarcastically), and we had a good time together. I saved him hours and hours of work, and I'm very proud of that!

So, on with my day! Broom, mop, trash bags, laundry pile...here I come!

October

Ah, the changing of the seasons. There are trees in town that are just vibrant. They take my breath away, make me want to stop the car and stare, invite me to walk my downtown streets.

 

The dried corn stalks in my garden sway and crackle in the breeze, and my box of green tomatoes reminds me that summer is indeed over. Slowly my plants brown and dry out, ready for me to trim them back for a long winter's nap. 

The crisping of the air draws me outside, leaves me slightly chilled and very happy. 

I love this time of year, when the days noticeably shorten, when the sun gets that golden afternoon glow, when the clouds that gather seem thick and pregnant. 

Fall in Colorado! Doesn't get much better than this!