Goodbye

Cavalier, was I, when we said goodbye? Too proud to cry?

Or was I just holding on as I drove home 

to cry alone?

That makes it sound like such a self-pitying act;

rather, a measured choice.

So many tears,

over so many days

as the little bodies drive away.

Oh, I'll cry, but I'll smile, too, 

remembering holding you. 

Waves

Lisa and her family are leaving tomorrow. Going back to Jordan. Those wonderful 4 kids will be out of my arms' reach for another couple of years. I've been quite nonchalant about this whole visit. God has given me an unprecedented peace about spending time together. Translation: I haven't felt stress about packing in time together in the short while they've been in my city. 

Tonight I feel a little bit different. 

Tonight I want to spend the next 36 hours with them. 

I want to whisper in their ears how much I love them, how special they are to me, how much I value their lives, who they are now, who they will become. 

And I can't seem to stop this wet stuff from leaking out of my eyes. What on earth can it be? How could saying goodbye to 4 little critters cause this kind of a physical breakdown? I'd better see my doctor about it. 

Oh, no...actually, I think I figured out what it is. Never mind. No need to worry about me. I'll be fine...eventually!

Pardon me, though, those of you who live here with me, if I have to talk about Lisa's kids incessantly for the next year, but didn't you see how cute they are?

Home...Again

I haven't exactly been burning up the keyboard writing this summer: I've been nearly completely absorbed by my sister's visit from Jordan, and what a wonderful time we've had! We just returned from a week in the mountains of Colorado where it was cool, sunny and beautiful. We swam, hiked, rode bikes, played tennis, and enjoyed one another's company. I pretty much did whatever the kids wanted, and that was fun and gratifying! Oh, don't get me wrong - there were definitely stresses. You get 8 adults and 6 kids together, and there will be family stress, but overall it was a great week. I certainly learned some things about vacationing with kids, and with a family group that big. 

Needless to say, though, I'm very glad to be back home. Now I need to tackle my very weedy yard, and plant some more grass seed. I also need to do a good bit of housework, but that probably goes without saying!

So from my end, all is well, nothing exciting to report, and that's all for now! ;-)

Home from San Diego!

We survived! ...and had some fun. I only have pictures of the fun. :-)

In the airport - Zachary's first time on those moving walkways. 

His cousins helped him!

Early morning romping

First stop - Sea World!

Watch out if you're in the "splash zone"!

Ok, I know it's not nearly in focus, but can you see how he's laughing?

He thought the killer whales splashing people was HILARIOUS!

And the finale!

My beautiful niece Hannah on a teacup ride...with me!

So we took all the kids to the beach. 

Zachary's first time...he's feeling safe with mommy.

Aunt Cindy, is this the world's biggest sandbox? Such a cute face!

By now the pants have come off and he's intrigued by the water...

...and loves jumping and splashing in it with mommy!

Such joy!

Lisa, Hannah and Ethan.

More joy!

Ethan, sitting in his baby backpack, wonders what the heck is going on!

And the big boys - all fun, no fear!

Joshua...

and David playing as the sun set.

And finally the plane ride home. 

Someone had a good nap in his seat. :-)

To all of you who prayed over this trip for my sisters and I - a great big thank you. Your prayers were felt and effective. The kids did great! We had a major meltdown with one kid, and a couple of rough nights with Ethan (8 mos. old), but other than that it was smooth sailing. They were cooperative, relaxed and had fun. We all got home safely, and I think only one of us caught Ethan's cold. It was me, but I'm recovering. ;-)

Ah, to be home and in my own space. I am missing the little guys, though. Good thing we're going to the mountains next week. I'll get one more week of nearly non-stop niece and nephew time! Big smile on this side of the computer...

To San Diego

I'm on my way to San Diego to visit my grandmother. She definitely lives in a beautiful city!

I'll be in great company! I'm going with my 2 older sisters, and their kids (all 6 of them). Here's my oldest nephew, Joshua. He's 8, and a lot like me when I was his age. 

And this is David, his 6 year old brother. 

Do you think he likes hunting for sand dollars? Check out that smile!

Ah, the beauty and peace of walking on the beach as the sun sets...

...or playing on the grass.  

I'll write when I get home. Bye, bye!

Approaching 40

I'm feeling a little blue this morning. I'm feeling a little old, too, and slightly disappointed in my body. 

First of all, I was supposed to go on a lovely, long wildflower hike this morning, and I just don't know if I can do it. My bad knee (actually, the worse of two bad ones!) is hurting rather badly, partly from working 5 hours in my yard yesterday (pictures to come - of the yard, not my knee!), and partly from the barometer changing and bringing in a storm. 

I believe the same barometer shift (and the time in my monthly cycle) brought on a migraine, awakening me around 5:30. Yes, the sun was just beginning to lighten the sky. My meds are working (very thankful), but I'm not sure if a hike is a good idea. 

Third, the 5 hours of work wore me out more than I would like. It seems as if I just can't do 5 hours of manual labor without paying a pretty high price of energy loss and muscle exhaustion. Ok, so I'm not quite the fittest lady on the planet, but I like to think of myself as fairly strong anyway. Am I fooling myself, or is this the onset of 40 (which I will be in September)? 

All this brings me to the ultimate question: What will the continued process of aging look like? Let me say this - I am not particularly stressed or fearful about aging. My hair has been graying for a while, and I've had various aches and pains for a long time. It has begun to dawn on me, though, that those aches and pains are most likely only going to get worse, and probably even multiply. Does that mean I'll lose a lot of my fun-ability? To hike, ride my bike, garden, etc.? 

I'm not panicking here, or obsessing about "getting old" per say, just ruminating on what this process means. I might eventually need to live in a ranch-style house so I don't have to carry laundry up and down the stairs. Yuck! At least I'm not worried about the cosmetics of aging. 

All right, I am a little worried about one thing. I have been blessed by genes with pretty good skin - no wrinkles, good complexion, etc. As I begin to develop that tissuey skin my mom had under her eyes, it's dawned on me that I will eventually get wrinkles, and that freaks me out a little. I think that will make me feel old faster than the other things because its been delayed. I guess thinking about it like this will, at least, prevent me from being taken by surprise!

So I'll try and just go with the flow, like everyone else; try to not fight against my body but work with it; and try to age gracefully with less complaining than I've done in the past few years. No point in belaboring an obvious and boring point. So I'm approaching 40? So what? I'll get on with it and just make the most out of every day - even if the physical "most" gets to be less and less. I can still sit on my porch and soak in the sunset, or watch my flowers grow and bloom with wonder and joy!

Since it's all a matter of perspective, isn't life awfully good?

Summer

I am having a remarkable summer! Here are the reasons why...

...I am getting very few migraines - so thankful, big hurrah!

...I am making visible progress on my yard. Late yesterday afternoon Tim called me outside to show me the very first tiny, nearly invisible blades of grass that have sprung up. I planted that! I tried to get a picture this morning, but my camera isn't good enough to accomplish photographing something so close to invisible. You all will just have to wait. :-)

...The irises from my mom and dad's house that I thought I had killed have come back. That is truly an unexpected joy!

...Not only is the grass coming in, but my flowers and groundcovers are growing and I can begin to imagine what they will look like next summer when they fill out and spread a little. Lovely! (All that's left in the front yard is more weeding and mulch.)

...Tim and I are spending some very nice evenings together watching baseball, movies, chatting, eating, just hanging out. 

...I'm getting some good, fun family time with sisters, etc. 

...And the cherry on top is that the nights are still so cool that I've been using two blankets while sleeping with my windows open. What a blessing for someone who doesn't like hot weather. Yes, the days are plenty warm (not hot), but those cool evenings make everything all right!

I could go on and on, but those are my favorite things so far! May all your days be as blessed and full of big and small joys.